


Time Of Our Lives

by BornToRun (generals_best)



Category: X-Men - All Media Types
Genre: M/M, Post-Relationship, reconnecting, they both have baggage
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-29
Updated: 2016-11-29
Packaged: 2018-09-03 01:04:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,378
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8690542
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/generals_best/pseuds/BornToRun
Summary: After years apart they start to slowly reconnect.Companion piece to "We Used To Be Free".





	1. Time grabs you by the wrist, directs you where to go

**Author's Note:**

> Rating may change with later chapters.  
> The story and chapter titles are taken from the Green Day song “Good Riddance (Time Of Your Life)”
> 
> The thought of making up for what I have done to the boys in "We Used To Be Free" got stuck in my head and eventually this is what happened. I don't have a clue where this going but I hope some of you will enjoy it. As this is a work in progress let me know what you think.

Scott was leaning against the hood of his red sports car, trying to relax in the afternoon sun. He looked over the clear lake to the trees that surrounded the far shore. No doubt their leaves were sporting all kinds of colours now. Autumn, they said, was the prettiest season up here. Not that this mattered to him. For the longer part of his life every season had only one colour: red. 

Being in the open and feeling the sun on his skin usually brought a certain calm to Scott's soul. But today he felt jittery. The five hour drive from Westchester/ New York to the Canadian border had left him more time alone with his thoughts than he had liked. 

Scott crossed his arms over his chest just to keep his hands from fiddling with his keys. He didn't know what to expect of their meeting. It had seemed like a good idea when Logan had called out of the blue last week and it had remained so the first fifty miles of the drive. Then his doubts had slowly started to creep in the closer he got to his destination. Why was he doing this? His life has been busy but good lately. He loved his job as a teacher, working with the kids and tutoring them to maybe become future X-men. And most of all, the fact that he was able to give something to the world with leading the now mostly bureaucratic fight against the manifestation of the Mutant Registration Act satisfied him. His life was fine without Logan. 

Then why had he filled in the request for a prolonged weekend minutes after Logan had hung up and handed it to Ororo first thing in the morning? After 200 miles and only his doubts as a companion the answer was as simple as it was devastating: he missed Logan more than he would ever miss anything in his life.

Scott took a deep breath. The air was already having that crisp feel to it that heralds the coming of winter. Another year that's almost over, he thought. That makes it three years now. Three years since Logan had walked out on him and they hadn't seen each other, nor spoken, for that matter.

Scott sighed. To be fair, Logan had not just walked out on him without so much as a by-your-leave. There was no use in denying it: they both had not been able to make it work in the long run and thus had found themselves at the end of the proverbial alley with no way to turn.  
First, it had been only in the little things. Logan staying away after solo missions longer than necessary or Scott putting his paperwork first even more than usual, both avoiding the time after hours when they were alone together. Over time, their differences seemed to get the upper hand more often than not. So one day after Logan had been away for weeks they finally had said their good-byes. Somehow they had managed to part on mutual terms, Logan taking his stuff and leaving for good. It had been liberating even if he was loath to admit it. 

In the years since when Scott looked back at it all he was surprised that they had even managed it this far. It seemed all too cliché. This thing between them had started a couple of years prior, turning them from rivals to friends-with-benefits to lovers. And, to every one's surprise, it had even culminated in marriage. 

They had been married for almost two years before they had to face the fact that it all had come to an end. He still wondered how he had not seen it coming though. He shook his head slightly. Love does turn a blind eye after all, it seemed. Why neither of them had filed for a divorce since was anyone's guess. 

He shifted his weight from one foot to the other and closed his eyes behind his glasses when he heard the unmistakable sound of a bike's engine. 

 

Logan did not drive all the way up to the shore but parked his bike a few meters away. He needed the moment it took him to walk over to the red car to collect his thoughts. The thrill of the drive still hummed in his veins but he forced himself to not rush over to were Scott was leaning against his car. 

This car, he snorted inwardly, was so Scott. At first it had surprised him to learn that the boy scout loved fast and shiny cars. But having gotten to know him he could not imagine any other sort of car for Scott. 

However, he had never seen him drive a red one before. Smiling to himself he crossed the short distance and approached the other man. 

“Never took ya for the red car type, Scotty. Thought colour did not matter to ya.” he said. 

Hearing the familiar voice Scott ducked his head and opened his eyes behind his glasses. Without turning to the other man Scott answered: “It doesn't. Though I've been told I always loved red as a kid. I like to meet people's expectations.” A soft smile was playing around his lips. It was good to see that even after these years the soft banter came easily between them.

“Then it's good I don't consider myself to be 'people'” Logan stated. “I think it's too fancy for ya.” Logan's tone was playful but Scott did not miss the honesty in his statement.

Scott uttered a short laugh and finally turned to Logan. “Yeah, I know you would. Guess that's why I chose it.” This was clearly an exaggeration but thinking about it now it maybe rang closer to the truth than he liked to admit to himself.

“It's good to see you again, Logan.”

“Good to see ya too, Slim.” Logan's tone held none of the ease it had moments ago when his gaze found Scott's behind the quartz lenses.


	2. Tattoos Of Memories And Dead Skin On Trial

Scott sat on a bench on the small veranda and watched the sun set over the lake. After meeting Logan this afternoon they had driven the short distance through the woods to the cabin Logan owned up here. It was basically just one big living room with a fireplace and an open kitchen to the right, a small bedroom and bathroom separated at the back. The veranda at the front overlooked the lake and the surrounding forest. Scott did not remember Logan mentioning it in their time together. He must have bought it after he had left. 

Logan came out and handed Scott a cool beer. “Thanks” Scott said and took a deep sip. 

Since arriving here they had unpacked Scott's car and put the groceries he had purchased earlier away after Logan had shown him around. They had talked a bit about what they had been up to since they had last seen each other. Scott was glad that small talk seemed not to be a problem between them. Logan had asked about the school and the kids, Rogue especially, and Scott did not mind to answer. He told him that she was far from being a kid anymore and was doing fine. She had finished her exams and taken up teaching introductory classes while applying for university. He told Logan about the others, too. Some of the older kids had left, however, Piotr and Bobby had stayed and were becoming valuable members of the team. Ororo, Hank and the professor were all well and life at the school was good. 

Later they had made some sandwiches and while eating them he had learned that Logan had picked up the search for his past near Alkali lake and had gained at least some success in finding a couple of files about the weapon-x program. There wasn't much left after the wave had flooded the facilities but it seemed they had a hidden archive at an abandoned military base near by. Logan did not go into much detail and Scott did not press him. He had always known that Logan had to fight his demons alone before he was able to let anyone in on them. 

Now the sun was slowly disappearing behind the lake's shore and the first stars were visible in the darkening sky. Scott had finished almost half of his beer and they had still not said a word, Logan leaning against the door frame and no doubt having emptied his bottle already. 

“Mind if I join you?” Logan asked indicating the bench.

Scott was shaken from his reverie and looked up at Logan. “Um, sure.” He shifted a bit so that Logan could sit down as well. The rest of the six pack sat on the floor in front of them and Logan opened himself another bottle. 

“You still good?” he asked eyeing Scott's half-finished beer. 

“Yeah, thanks. Still not much of a drinker, I guess.” Scott said with a small smile. 

“That's good. You never could hold ya liquor well anyway.” Logan chuckled.

“Hey!” Scott elbowed Logan playfully. “But you are right” he said with an ironic laugh. “I am still pathetic when trying to drown my sorrows.” 

The light mood between them was suddenly gone. Scott heard Logan take another gulp of his beer. Way to go, Scott! he chided himself inwardly and turned to his own beer instead.

 

Logan did not expect to feel out of his depths so quickly. He knew that meeting Scott after all this time was not going to be a walk in the park. He was kidding no one here. They had baggage and needed to deal with it. However, they had managed not too badly so far with talking shop about the school and his search and enjoying a beer in companionable silence. He was even starting to hope that it could be like old times when the light banter that felt so familiar between them started to resurface.

Now he didn't know what to say. Nothing new there, he thought. He had never been the talkative one in their relationship. But he was here to at least try, he told himself.

“Ya in need to drown much?” he asked tentatively. “You said earlier that life was good for you now.” He chanced a glance sideways at the other man. 

Scott thought about that for a moment before he answered. “It is. I guess I should not be complaining. I love working with the kids and Charles gave me more responsibility with the school's administration and I am good at that.” He took another sip of his beer. “What I am still not good at is dealing with myself.” He sighed and looked at the stars that were now crowding the dark sky over the lake, shimmering a pale red. There were millions of stars up there yet he knew they were thousands of light years apart. “I am lonely, Logan” he said very quietly.

Logan sat very still, his beer forgotten in his hand. His gaze followed Scott's into the distant darkness over the lake. He realised he had no idea if Scott had moved on after he had left. Somehow he had assumed that Scott would be in a relationship again. He was the type that needed someone by his side and he still looked good. So much so it had almost taken Logan's breath away when he saw him for the first time again this afternoon.

He didn't know what to say or do after Scott's admission. He tried to fight his instinct to cut and run again. He could do this. His senses told him that Scott was anxious for his reaction. A faint scent of fear mixed with uncertainty drifted over to him. Still the same old self doubts there, bub? 

He shifted so that he could look at Scott. The moonlight enhanced the sharp features of his face with the high cheekbones and strong jaw. His lips were set in a tight line and the ruby glasses shielded his eyes, reflecting the moonlight. Logan's gaze fell to a speck of pale light where Scott's left hand held the now empty beer bottle in a firm grip against his thigh. 

“You are still wearing it” Logan said with genuine astonishment. 

 

Outwardly Scott managed to breathe calmly. Slow, steady breaths through the nose, he told himself, while on the inside he tried not to panic. He was fighting the voices inside his head that relentlessly told him that he was not worth the dark under his nails and that it was his own fault he was alone. If Logan would ask him to leave now who could blame him. He did not deserve any better. What was he thinking putting his own misery right in front of Logan like that?

It took him a moment to realise Logan had addressed him. He blinked and turned his head to look at the other man. “Huh?”

“You are still wearing the ring” Logan repeated indicating the silver band on his left ring finger with a nod of his head.

Scott looked at his own hand. Yes, there it was since the day Logan had put it on his finger and wowed to love and cherish him. After Logan had left he could not bring himself to take it off. Every time he thought he was ready he just couldn't do it. It would have confirmed that he failed at yet another marriage, that he could not keep the person he loved by his side. 

Shaking himself from his internal pity party Scott stood up and collected the empty bottles. 

“It is late, Logan. It's been a long day and I am tired” he said and walked into the cabin. He knew it wasn't fair to walk out on Logan like this but he just couldn't do it tonight. After three years of no contact it all threatened to overwhelm him now.  
He put the bottles on the kitchen counter and went into the bathroom to brush his teeth. 

 

Logan remained on the veranda after Scott had left. He opened another beer and downed it almost in one go. Once again he cursed the fact that he could not get drunk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologise for Scott getting a bit carried away in his self pitty here.


End file.
